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The most common causes of male and female orgasmic disorders are both physiological and psychological in nature. These disorders are triggered by factors including but not limited to: depression, feelings of guilt, anger, fear, low self-esteem, anxiety. Since all of these listed factors are often directly linked to stress, we can generalize that one of the major detrimental factors in a couples’ inability to maximize sexual satisfaction is stress. According to many of today’s surveys, stress is linked to such disorders as essential hypertension, tension headaches, stomach aches, anxiety, sleep disorders, and more. Practically, each of us to a certain degree suffers from anxiety, which is a result of higher than normal sympathetic activity. It is impossible to get maximum satisfaction from intimacy at the time of a high level of sympathetic activity. Sexual responses are regulated by the mutual activities of the sympathetic and parasympathetic divisions of the nervous system but under the dominant influence of the parasympathetic division as well as the involvement of somatic innervations. Even upon considering the difference in female and male reflex pathways before intimacy, and during sexual activity, the functions of the autonomic nervous system are similar. That includes blood vessel dilation, which causes penis and clitoris erections, vaginal smooth muscle contractions at the time of orgasm, as well as smooth muscle constrictions at the time of ejaculation. In addition, activities of the parasympathetic division of the autonomic nervous system regulate the digestive system, pulmonary system, as well as sensation of sexual satisfaction. At the same time, it is the main inhibitor of over-active sympathetic activity. When a most parasympathetic potential is directed to inhibit over-active sympathetic activity, it is impossible to expect normal parasympathetic functioning during the sexual act. At the same time, only normal parasympathetic functioning is necessary for sexual satisfaction.
Also, it is important to mention that, under stress, our skeletal muscles demonstrate higher muscular tension, which in turn limits the range of muscular constrictions. Contractions of the skeletal pelvic muscles are accompanied by orgasm in both sexes, and unless these muscles are relaxed, it is hard to expect full sexual satisfaction. Stress presents a number of serious challenges toward maximizing the quality of sex and sexual satisfaction. Many people try to manage stress by being very sexually active. Factually, this doesn’t work and may cause trouble in personal relationships because in such cases, under stress, harmony is difficult to achieve.
The good news is that it is clinically and scientifically proven that massage can address and eliminate these challenges.
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Having spent many years in the treatment room, I repeatedly witnessed a common phenomenon among patients, which appeared on the surface to be bizarre behavior. While massaging an absolutely healthy part of the body with no signs of pain, suddenly, a person started crying, shaking, or complaining about the room being cold when it was 75 degrees warm. Often in the aftermath, patients felt embarrassed and even apologized for their emotional outbursts. Although science does not have a well-established explanation for this phenomenon, there are working hypotheses described as, “body cells carrying emotional memory;” that is, negative memories stored in a body part that begin to surface. Crying, shaking, or complaining of cold are all expressions of an emotional release, accompanied by muscular constriction, and followed by the relaxation of a body part or the entire body.
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